Humor In The Midst...

Well, no recap necessary. Y'all already know about the stuff going on in my life, but I did want to share this small and somewhat humorous (in a completely ironic way) tidbit.

My friend Megan, our art teacher, has this sign hanging in her classroom:

There will be no crisis this week. My schedule is full.

I saw it today and just had to laugh. I always laugh when I see it...every time I take my kids to Art. She always knows what I'm laughing at and the kids just stand there looking like I've sprouted another head. Today one of the kids asked, "What is so funny Ms. Stewart?"

I could only respond, "Irony sweetheart...irony."

Tomorrow is the day the "cancer" is removed. Please say a prayer (or send out well-wishes as the case may be) that the doctor gets it all and that no hairy butt/leg skin needs to be taken and that come Wednesday cancer will just be a bad memory. I'll post an update as soon as I know something worth telling.

Friendly Dinner Mishap

One of my favorite things about going to Conroe (about 30 miles away...you know...the "big city") is that my friend Nina and I (usually) get to go out to dinner! Where I live there are only a handful of restaurants...Chili's, a BBQ joint, and a dozen or so Mexican places. It gets pretty boring for the taste buds.


Well, several nights ago I got suckered into craving Olive Garden thanks to a new commercial advertising the stuffed rigatoni and sausage (by the way...yummy!). For that kind of indulgence I have to make a trip down Nina's way. Just my luck...Nina didn't mind eating out. The last time we went to Olive Garden it was a great experience. This time...not so much.


It was one mishap after another. For all the nitty gritty details go here...Nina's Life and check out her version (you might have to scroll...). It is pretty much mishap by mishap what happened! Plus, I'm all about pimpin' a friend's blog. Y'all go show her all the blog love y'all show me...and you'll get to read a funny story in the process.


What are you still doing here....go!

Blackberry Blunder

It should come as a shock to no one, but I am not good with technological gadgets. Seriously, it is a miracle that I can work things like the remote or the computer. Even then, sometimes I get frustrated and want to whack the heck out of it! When I got my new cell phone (I finally upgraded to something not from the 1990s) I had to scour the manual to find out how to do the basics. Yes, I live in a sad little low-tech world!

Well, yesterday my cousin and I were out and about. We'd gone out to lunch and were on the hunt for a movie theater that was showing The Other Boleyn Girl. She has a gerbil or German or something...anyway, it's one of those things that tells you where you are and where you need to go. It sits on the dashboard. It was turning out to be of no help, so she dug out her blackberry for us to use the Internet to find movie listings.

I should mention that we were driving along in Houston area traffic so she said, "You do know how to use the Internet right?" Well, of course I know how to use the Internet...when it is on a computer screen. She handed over the phone thing and I looked at it thinking, "Where is the A key?" Yeah, I was pushing all sorts of buttons. I must have had a seriously perplexed look on my face, because she started cracking up. It wasn't just any normal cracking up, but that kind where you hear no sound coming out. Babies do that...when they make that face, but no sound comes out. You know it is going to be one loud fit when the voice catches up with the face. I quickly handed the thing back like it was a hot potato! And then I caught the giggles.

You know, maybe you just had to be there, but I have serious issues with blackberries! Maybe I just have serious issues with technology! I swear...

For The Honk Of It

After all this time, you guys probably know just how easily amused I am. Usually that amusement comes from things I see or hear, but today I was totally amused by myself. Being able to laugh at yourself is a sign of a healthy self esteem...or so I'm told. Well, today I'm extremely healthy!

A few weeks ago, I had to have my car put in the shop (code words for I had to spend an exuberant amount of money...). I had originally decided to have it looked at because my horn had all but given up the ghost. Seriously, this would be the best post to make audible. I'm sure you'd be highly amused to hear me wheeze and whooo like my practically dead horn, but alas I'm not that technologically advanced. So, just imagine me sitting here making wheezey and whoooy noises. The replacing of the horn was needed so my car would pass inspection. Well, I am definitely going to pass inspection!

Today after school, I needed to run to the little mail shipping place I use to drop off a package. The box was kind of bulky so I didn't want to wag in more than necessary. I grabbed my purse (also kind of bulky) and set it against the steering wheel to dig out my checkbook. Now, pre-outrageous amount to fix car (can you tell I'm still a little bitter about the loss of that $680?) I could have sat on the horn and it wouldn't have made a peep. Well, post-fix the horn is how shall I say...sensitive. Apparently the edge of my purse was pressing against the center of the wheel. When I reached into the pocket to grab my checkbook I pressed a little too hard I guess.

Now, here is the part that just tickles my funny bone. I didn't realize it at the time, but there was another lady parked next to me that walking in front of my car at the exact moment I pressed a little too hard. My horn, now fully functional and loud, tooted big time. Startled, I looked up to see her jump and I guess I hit it because before I knew it the horn was going off...again. I couldn't get my purse off my lap fast enough. By that time, I was tickled by seeing her jump and then me jump and then that horn going off again.

I did manage to get out of the car, with my checkbook, and the box without further incident. I apologized to her once I got inside the building. Thankfully, she was super nice about it all! Even she joined in with a little chuckle of her own. She did say it was a good thing she's worn her Depends. You just have to like a woman that can laugh at the fact that she needs "leakage" protection!

If all that wasn't bad enough, on the way to my next stop I hit the horn again. Now, if you knew my family you would understand this total "Mimi moment". Several years ago, my Mimi had this van that must have been possessed. The horn would just go off at random times. No one ever wanted to ride in that thing, but it sure was funny when you did! So, needless to say, from here on out (or until this horn goes all wheezey and whoooy) I will make sure I'll watch exactly what I put against the wheel!

Have You Laughed Today?!

It is back to work tomorrow and while I am ready to get back into my routine I'm not ready, as in prepared, to go back. Monday was a scheduled workday, but little work got done. It wasn't my fault though (so my story and I'm so stickin' to it)! I had to catch up with everyone for the first hour. Then I needed to whip out some lesson plans for a team meeting after lunch. Then I got invited to go out to lunch (with people I hadn't caught up with during the first hour) so I went. Then we had a team meeting...which lasted entirely too long...grrr. So, I finally got back to my room about 3:15. At 3:20 the assistant principal announces that the building will be closing with the alarm set at 4:00. Everyone was very surprised, but what can you do? So this afternoon I worked like crazy and managed to just get my desk cleaned off. Tomorrow will start early and probably end late!

Today was the required staff development in-service day. Normally this seems like a big waste of time. Seriously, that is just how it is. Well, today we had some pretty funny presenters and the material actually was very useful and relevant to me. There were a few "when is this over again?" moments, but mostly I was engaged.

The funniest part of the whole day was when someone would volunteer to answer a question the facilitators would share a cheer and then we'd all do it. You know teachers are easily amused so we all had fun. My favorite was one called the truck driver. You pretend that you're driving a truck and then you pump your arm in the air and pull the air horn. Then you pretend you've got a CB radio in your hand and say, "Good job little buddy...ten four!" For some reason, that completely cracked up the teachers at my table. We all wanted to have cool CB radio names. Any suggestions?!

Well, the teachers on my team have decided to teach these cheers to our kids so when someone needs some celebrating everyone can cheer them. But first, we're just going to do the cheer randomly...like when someone gets an answer right or does something cheer worthy. We're pretty sure our kids will look at us like we're nuts, and maybe we are, but you've got to find your laughs where you can!

And if you need some cheering let me know...I've got some good ones! (Hey, my kids can look at me like I'm nuts...y'all have to just love me as is!)

It's All About The Gourds

This week is done...thank you Lord! For some reason I thought not being a firsty would make life easier. Apparently not. It was "everything is due" day...grades, assessments, lesson plans, the works. I'm so ready for the weekend!

I'm heading out of town tomorrow morning. I'm meeting my parents and dad's sisters in Waco this weekend for a gourd festival. Seriously, I know. Gourds aren't really my thing, but maybe I'll learn something. Basically, I'm going to visit with family that I don't see very often (and oh yeah there is a story there about that) and a little bit because it's the middle of Fall and people should go to gourd type things right?!

I'm taking an open mind and my digital camera. Updates when I return home Sunday. I wonder if I'll see any gourds like this...



I think this dude is called The Flasher! This is even funnier because my very proper Mama sent me this in an email. LOL! Oh my, obscene squash.

Laughter Is Good For The Soul

I'm one of the lucky ones. The easily amused lucky ones I mean. During a really horrible year in college (I had the roomie from hell) I had basically forgotten to take some time and laugh. My mom reminded me that I've always been a happy person and sometimes you've just got to laugh to keep from going insane (or to prison for killing aforementioned roomie). She told me that as a baby/toddler she'd hear me in the other room just laughing and entertaining myself. I think those moments were pretty precious to her. So, apparently it started young. Yep, I often crack myself up and find humor in the most absurd things.

For example, I have certain words that just tickle my funny bone. Wiener (and not for any dirty reason) is one of them. I remember being in Houston on a Girl Scout trip one year and seeing a department store called Wieners. What an odd name for a department store don't you think? It was probably a men's store... Anyway, that word just stuck. I have a couple of friends that will toss it into the conversation just to get me going and I'm ashamed to admit that it works pretty well.

Another word is Twinkies. This one is sorta steeped in a dirty history (which to my mom's probable delight I'll skip sharing) but that word just makes me giggle. It could have been the context in which it was used but I'll never say the word the same again. I'm giggling now and I'm just typing it! Good grief.

Well, yesterday I got to add another word to the list. Waft. I know...seems like a harmless word. It all started before our Open House (like meet the teacher sorta) at school and one of the other teachers asked me to sniff her to see if she smelled like Subway. I (apparently not so subtly) leaned in and sniffed. I didn't smell anything sandwhichy. But just to be sure I gently fanned my paper in my hand to waft any scent over to my nose. (Yes, this is how tired teachers spend the night...sniffing each other.) Anyway, she asked what I was doing and I told her I was seeing if any scent wafted over.

Apparently, she'd never heard the term waft and wanted to know if I'd gotten confused and meant queefed. I quickly assured her that I wasn't the one confused! Well, that started a whole waft conversation and ended up with her telling another teacher to "Waft this!". I'm sure something is completely lost in translation but the scene was pretty funny. Well, today everything was waft this or waft that. And I spent a good portion of the day giggling to myself.

Words aren't the only thing that amuse me, but I think I should wrap this up. I would imagine many are thinking I'm something of a nut and well...maybe you're right. But I'm a happy nut!