12:41

It is after midnight. Where should I be...bed. Where am I...in front of the computer. My body is tired and begging for bed, but I can not shut my mind off. There are so many things rattling around up there.

I'm worried that I won't find another job and I'll be stuck in the hell that is where I work.

I'm frustrated because I'm not in control right now. I hate having any of my ducks out of a row and right now the job duckie (a huge duckie) is missing altogether.

I'm disappointed in myself that I hate where I am and while I'm making efforts to change where I am and daily trying to find the positive I still hate where I am. I hate that I hate it.

I'm excited about an upcoming vacation (to Amman, Jordan this Christmas!)

I'm trying to stay in perspective when it comes to this guy. My emotions are trying to run wild, but my head (and mother) are shouting back perspective perspective perspective.

My bed is calling and I really should return. I still feel like sleep is a long way off, but perhaps I'll rest more if I'm under the covers with the lights out.

Mind...go to sleep!

They Don't Get Much Better

Today was good on a lot of levels.

It was Friday.
It was payday (and my step raise kicked in...not much but more than I was getting!).
It was mac and cheese day in the cafeteria (you know the really cheesy clog you up for a week cheesy kind).
There were also veggie sticks in the cafeteria.
My lesson plans are in and I'm 93% ready for Monday morning.
I had a very enjoyable dinner out tonight.

And today's goodness is running over into tomorrow.

It will be Saturday.
I will get to sleep late.
The only chore on my plate is laundry (let's face it...it never goes off my plate!).
I'm going shopping (okay so it's only grocery shopping but shopping is shopping!).

So, like I said...the days don't get much better than this!

I Heart My Bed

If someone were to ask me what my favorite thing about my home is I would say my bed without missing a beat. I love my bed! And more specifically I love being in my bed.



There it is...my bed. I thought briefly about making it up before I took the picture but I'm all about being honest on here. My bed usually gets made once a week...when I change the sheets. I love to just straighten out the covers before I crawl in at night. It's a lived in bed. What else can I say?!

When I was in college the only sitting room we had in those dorms was the bed. I really think this is when the love affair began. I got so used to doing everything (from eating, homework, watching tv, etc.) on my bed and the habit just stuck. I'm sure there are people that think I'm the ultimate in lazy because I spend so much time there but I get stuff done on the bed! It's my absolute favorite place to grade papers and watch TV.

Anyway, after having been gone for so long from my bed, I was really looking forward to getting a good night's sleep in my own bed last night. Y'all know about my flare for travel and I do love it, but the one thing always missing on trips is my bed. I'm still working on how I can fold it up and pack it in with all the other essentials. So far...well I think it's a pipe dream!

When I got home yesterday (and yes it's great to be home!) I brought in my suitcase and immediately put my body in bed for a few minutes. I snuggled down into the feather pillow top and my plethora of pillows. Now that is coming home! I hadn't been home maybe three hours when the power went out. Yep, the lights flicked and the computer turned off...power outage. My first concern was mainly the heat. Since I'd been gone for a while I'd turned the air up (to save money which is a whole other story...grrr) and it was still pretty warm in here. Plus, while it wasn't dark when the power went off it would get that way soon. Being in a hot dark house didn't sound appealing. So I left. I went to get coffee and then shopping with a friend. If I couldn't be enjoying my bed I figured the next best thing was shopping!

I kept calling the power company and every time they kept pushing back the time when the power would be back on. By 9:30 I was afraid that I'd be spending yet another night without my bed. It may sound wimpy but I wasn't staying in a house where the thermostat was hovering around 86 and I couldn't even turn on a fan. After making the decision to come home and gather up my toothbrush and a pillow I was headed to the nearest hotel. Thankfully, when I pulled in my drive lights were on in my house! I had power once again.

I was happy with the power being back on, don't get me wrong, but I was thrilled that I'd be sleeping at home...cradled in pillow top...surrounded by cool pillows...in my comfy sanctuary...in my bed. And after having slept soundly for several hours I'm refreshed and ready to face the day.

I heart my bed!

An Early-To-Bed-er

Last night I made a startling discovery....I'm actually an old fart in the body of a young and fresh twenty-something. It's okay. I had to take a moment to let it set in too.

This all came about because a friend wanted me to come over and hang out last night. Normally, I'd jump at the chance, but last night it was about 9:30 when she called. I should add in that I was coming off of a touch of the stomach virus so that might have played a part...though an extremely small one. Anyway, I glanced at my clock (9:34pm) and then I took in my surroundings (under the covers, in my bed, in my pajamas, with sleepy crusts already forming in the corner of my eyes) and decided that it was just "too late" for tonight.

And then that is when she lowered the boom on me..."You're such an old fart!". Okay, so I admit...I like to go to bed early. I still have a bedtime and I pretty much follow it regularly. I didn't like being called an old fart but I couldn't argue. Then came the worst part. "Oh well...it is past your bedtime. Sleep tight Granny! See you in the morning."

Apparently, being an old fart wasn't just a one time thing. I guess it's something I am all the time. So, it brings to mind a few questions.

What exactly is an old fart?

I think of old farts being old...really old. And they are grouchy. I'm not really old. I'm not even regularly old. I'm young. I'm in the prime of my life. I'm living the carefree life of a woman in her mid-twenties. Oh, I'm doing all that, but on the sleeping schedule of an old person. And I'm not grouchy. Okay, fine...I'm not grouchy very much. I think it's because I'm getting enough sleep people!

Is being responsible equal to being an old fart?

Just because I make sure I'm in bed where I can get a reasonable 7-8 hours of sleep a night doesn't mean I'm an old fart. It means that I'm a responsible adult. I make sure that my body has the energy to go and do all those twenty-something activities. By getting a good night's sleep, I'm being responsible with my body. Just the other day I read all kinds of benefits that come to your body from getting sleep. And, hello...the biggest one of all...I have a job that requires me to get up early (5:45 IN THE MORNING) so it just makes sense to get a good night's sleep.

What bedtime qualifies one to be an old fart?

When I think of old folks going to bed, I think of them hitting the sack in the afternoon. I definitely don't do that! So what if I go to bed about 10pm on most nights? I think that is a perfectly normal time to start winding down for the day. I think it just seems early considering that my accuser usually rolls into bed about 2am. Yeah...I don't have the sleeping habits of an old person. She has the sleeping habits of an infant...always up in the middle of the night.

Should I really have to defend my sleeping habits?

NO! My sleeping habits are keeping me healthy, well rested, and not so grouchy. I don't sleep with anyone so I'm not having to worry if someone is ready for bed. I should be able to go to bed at 10pm if I want to and you know what? Most of the time I want to!

So there it is. A twenty-something year old can also be an old fart when it comes to going to bed. Hmm...that wasn't as hard as I thought it'd be!