It is after midnight. Where should I be...bed. Where am I...in front of the computer. My body is tired and begging for bed, but I can not shut my mind off. There are so many things rattling around up there.
I'm worried that I won't find another job and I'll be stuck in the hell that is where I work.
I'm frustrated because I'm not in control right now. I hate having any of my ducks out of a row and right now the job duckie (a huge duckie) is missing altogether.
I'm disappointed in myself that I hate where I am and while I'm making efforts to change where I am and daily trying to find the positive I still hate where I am. I hate that I hate it.
I'm excited about an upcoming vacation (to Amman, Jordan this Christmas!)
I'm trying to stay in perspective when it comes to this guy. My emotions are trying to run wild, but my head (and mother) are shouting back perspective perspective perspective.
My bed is calling and I really should return. I still feel like sleep is a long way off, but perhaps I'll rest more if I'm under the covers with the lights out.
Mind...go to sleep!
Sunday, April 20, 2008
12:41
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12 comments:
Oh girl, I feel your pain. I'm suffering from sleepless nights myself and it just isn't fun, is it? I had to laugh when you included your mother in the parentheses about the man perspective. Aren't mothers painfully blunt?? I'm sure everything is going to work out okay for you, somehow life always find a way.... In the meantime, try to focus on the fun things like your upcoming vacation! Woot!
Steff,
Hey girl...I am sorry you couldn't sleep due to your mind on overload. I hear you about the job - remember my horrific job in Lubbock that I had for three years?? It is so hard to stay positive but you can, you are doing great. One day at a time. Also have you tried looking outside that area for a new job? I know you love it there but I didn't know if it was an option or not. About the guy issue, I would love to hear more about what is going on. I will email you! I hope you have a good day...don't stress!
Poor thing - I know exactly how you feel! I can't count the times I've stayed up at night, tossing and turning, trying to figure out the answers to my problems - only to figure out that there were none to be had in the wee hours of the morning!
It'll get better! I promise!
I was right where you are at this time last year (job wise). I don't know about there, but around here openings aren't even posted until end of April and first of May...hang tight. The right job will come along!!! (And there is still that opening here in Arkansas I was telling you about! ha!)
Yeah! Now you know how I feel. Yours sleepless night is probably just this one time, mine is every night.
Job - I am worried too. Although I am not as unhappy as you are, I want out. The fact that I haven't heard anything from anyone, really scares me and i can't figure out what to do about it.
Disappointment - with my weight problem, and the fact that I have actually attempted to do something about it, but nothing is happening.
Excitement - Brooklynn is coming, and our trip to the beach
I wish their was a guy in my life. After Jennifer's wedding, I wish it even more. I am tired of being single.
I don't think my comment is going to make you feel any better, but at least you know you are not in this boat alone.
Next time you are awake in the middle of the night call me, chances are I am up.
I hate my sleepless nights... I wish I had a solution.
Hey Steff-Hang in there...I have so much to say about this post but I will email you!!
What guy thing?
Sitting here in Mississississippi with Ms Bethany. We both say Hey!
You're going to Jordan for Christmas?! Jealous!
We all lose our heads about boys, but it's more fun that way! :-)
ah yuck, mental overload... hope you are feeling better. What guy thing??
Also, curious about the "listen to our shpiel and get a free trip to whatever" thing... we've been getting daily calls for the same thing, but it's a trip to Orlando IF you sit though a 90-minute conference on resort-investment. This guy has been calling DAILY and asking for personal info..I finally told him LOOK I'm in CANADA, dude.. I cannot get to your Florida resort anyway, please stop calling!!! Hope it works out better for you (I vote for free+happy+no strings). Good luck!!!
Read this only now. Hang in there Honey. Life will get better! It will. You just have to try to stay positive. Each morning I give myself a little pep talk ... Today could get better. So smile, laugh, try to forget the problems for a while and just enjoy your day. Before I know it, the day is over and tomorrow is another day when I wake up and give myself that little pep talk again!
Chug along Sweetie. It will all fall into place!
Jacquie
wow, we are having a similar problem with our ducks!
I haven't been blogging much either, and although I call it having things up in the air, instead of ducks in a row, we seem to be having issues with our job ducks!
I hope we both get things resolved, and SOON!
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