Thursday, March 30, 2006

Little Flirt

I subbed in a kindergarten class today and I had the time of my life! The kids were a handful but it was the fun kind of handful. I even got proposed to...how sweet is that?! This little flirt came in this morning and did a double take. Here is a transcript of our conversation:

Little Flirt: "So, what's your name?"
Amused Teacher: "Miss Stewart."
LF: "Like Stewart Little...I like it."
AT: "Thanks...please sit down and color your morning work page."
LF: "You are pretty Miss Stewart."
AT: " You still have to sit down and color, but thank you!"

I prefer the older grades, but I'd forgotten how much fun six year olds can be. Most of the day was a blur of chaos, but fun nonetheless. There were several more flirty comments about my shoes, hair, necklace, and smile. Someone is raising this boy right! But the absolute highlight of the day came before he left. I had all the kids sitting on the carpet playing the quiet game.

LF: (in front of all the kids) "Miss Stewart...are you married?"
AT: "Nope."
LF: (with the most adorable little grin) "Me either."

Since I've started subbing there have been a lot of things that didn't amuse me, but today was one of those days that reminded me why I love kids so much!

Wednesday, March 29, 2006

Interference

In the football game of life, I'd have thrown a huge yellow flag doodad at Queen B the other day for MAJOR interference in my personal business. I suppose you want the story from the beginning. Okay...fine. Make me relive it.

When I first started subbing back in September I had a contact that made getting jobs a little easier. Maybe she felt like I was the puppy at the table that deserved to have a few scraps thrown it's way every now and then. Whatever her motivation, I was grateful. She'd let me know what jobs were coming up and then she'd make sure that I got them. (Now I wonder how many other people got the treatment I'm now receiving.) Anyway, I turned a blind eye to anything that might not have been on the up and up.

Let's just fast forward through several months of getting several jobs thanks to Queen B.

Now, in February, a friend of mine went cross ways with Queen B's daughter. (Note: I have a habit of ending up going round and round on the gossip mill so I tried very hard to stay out of this situation considering I didn't want to do anything to upset the delicate balance of her giving me jobs and me seeming grateful.) I'm all for mothers being protective of their daughters, but some take it to the extreme. Apparently, Queen B passed down a judgment that if I am associated with anyone who doesn't like her daughter I must be talking trash about her too. So, the job well has completely dried up. I think it's petty and dumb but hey...I shouldn't need her to make it in the sub world. I'm a dang good sub. People have said so...from principals on down. I wasn't too worried considering I had at least five jobs lined up that I'd been requested for by teachers at Queen B's school. Now comes the flag throwing.

Queen B blocked ALL five sub jobs. Yep. Blocking them as in I can't have them. As in she gave them to someone else. As in there went my $275. She says she is doing it because there probably aren't going to be any openings at that campus. She claims she's just "helping" me get my name out there by getting me to take other jobs at other schools. She's lying. She's punishing me for something she thinks I did. I even asked point blank if there was some reason other than a professional one as to why I'd been blocked. She gave me the run-around. I was pretty upset to say the least. And I wasn't the only one. The teacher that had requested me called me at home to ask about the situation. I didn't know much at that point...yeah I had plenty of suspicions but nothing I'd feel safe repeating...so I told her I'd continue to look into it. That's when she said she didn't trust many subs in her classroom and she really wanted me in there with her kids.

So, I called the district sub coordinator and asked if there was any reason why I might be being blocked. He was reluctant to agree it was anything other than oversight. I didn't go into the whole "she's punishing me" thing. I'm trying to be professional here. Anyway, he did say that if it continued into a pattern to call him back.

So here I am...frustrated that she's doing this. Having to scrounge up jobs on my own...which is harder than I thought it would be. Oh, and did I mention that I see Queen B three times a week outside of the school system? I'm going to kill her with kindness cause I can't just flat out kill her.

I'm joking people.

Monday, March 27, 2006

Etiquette Schmetiquette

Warning...I'm on a tear today but since the real issue is still too raw to even blog about (though don't worry I will find the strength to post about it) I'm after all those people who are just plain tacky when it comes to most things etiquette related.

Seeing as how I'm not married, I've never had a bridal shower. I have, however, hosted a few and attended my fair share. For the most part (not withstanding the whole always a bridesmaid never a bride rant) I really enjoy them. Yeah...even the clothes pin game. Anyway, a few weeks ago I got an invitation to the bridal shower of a friend's sister. I went to school with B and we were pretty good friends. Now though, we're in different stages of life and different towns and we hardly stay in touch. So, I'm already thinking how come I'm getting an invitation to her sister's shower? Sure, I know L, but we weren't close and I was a year ahead of her in school. Maybe showers are one of those times it's okay to invite every single person you've ever known who might bring you a gift?

Now...the gift. We're getting to the real part of what irked me. At the bottom of the invitation (and it was a very pretty invitation) it says "Please bring an unwrapped gift.". Who thinks asking for a gift (unwrapped no less!) on the invitation is just a tad bit...TACKY? Sure, the whole point of a shower is to get showered with gifts, but to come right out and ask for one...blows my mind. And what is up with an unwrapped gift? I love presents (ask anyone that has ever given me one!) and I love to wrap too. I just couldn't understand the point of an unwrapped gift. Maybe it's supposed to save time for the bride, but unwrapping is half the fun. At least for me. Anyway, anyone want to guess what I did?

I bought the obvioulsy required gift and WRAPPED it up in pretty tissue and put it in a gorgeous sack. And no...mine wasn't the only gift wrapped. There are other rebels out there! That's what my mom called me...a rebel because I don't usually take well to being told what to do....such as bring an unwrapped gift. And for all of you out there rolling your eyes at me I didn't grudgingly purchase the gift. I do like L and wish her and her hubby-to-be a great life together. I think she enjoyed it just the same...even if she did have to unwrap it.

Another thing that really gets me, etiquette wise, is people who do not write thank you notes. I know in this modern age email is so prevalent and the good old telephone is good too, but it really shows you appreciate a person (and the gift) when you take the time to write a handwritten thank you note. Can you guess who had to write thank you notes after every birthday and Christmas from the time she could write? And I'm not complaining...I think it's where my love of letter writing started. I'm just saying people a few lines about how you liked the gift (even if you hate it) goes a long way!

And one final thing...don't slurp your extra milk from the cereal bowl. It's uncivilized. Use your spoon.

Ahh, I feel a little better. I'm still plenty hacked, but that post will have to wait. I'm in the middle of trying to resolve it and I want to post once I have all the facts together. And I'm kind of hot tempered and can say things I often regret in the heat of the moment so a few days to cool myself down isn't necessarily a bad thing.

Saturday, March 25, 2006

Complete Fool

Oh, there is nothing like making a complete fool of oneself in a very public forum. There is the very good chance that I took a little teasing a little too far and now am left feeling very foolish and immature. Don't you just hate days like that?

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

New York City...Entertained (Last Act)


I know, I know...I've been dragging this out forever. But here it is...the final chapter in one of the best trips I've taken. I hope you enjoy!

Also, D has agreed to answer questions. They can be questions about me and her, our trip, her and Nelly...well you get the point. Anyway, if you have a burning question just post it in the comment box. I'll email them to D and then I'll post her responses. She said to bring them on...the good, the bad, the ugly, and the lewd!



Pause
The story I am now about to tell was the highlight of my trip. Read very carefully!

> Play >
Steffany took my picture in front of the “Trump International Hotel and Tower” sign, and then we headed up the block to Lincoln Center. As we were passing the front entrance, we both curiously looked up to see if we could see inside. I noticed this big black man walking out of the door. My first thought was, “Who is he supposed to be?” Everyone knows that the only people that stay in a Trump hotel are rich people and famous people. We kept walking just a few steps when a new idea hit me. “What if he is someone’s body guard?” I thought. I turned my head back to see if he was protecting someone, and indeed, he was. As he walked down the stairs, someone else came into view. IT WAS NELLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! That’s right, multi-platinum selling, washboard abs having, grill wearing rapper, NELLY!!!!!! I was like, “OH MY GOD, it’s NELLY!!!” To which Steffany responded, “Who?” I explained to her that he was famous rapper. I immediately handed my camera to Steffany, and said, “Oh my God, Steffany, I have to see if he’ll take a picture with me.” I was going to ask his bodyguard if I could take a picture with him, because he was talking to another fan at the time; but then he started walking down the stairs. I looked up at him and said, “Will you take a picture with me?” Then he said, “Yeah, real quick.”
We turned toward Steffany, HE PUT HIS ARM AROUND ME, and Steff snapped the picture. Then I turned to him and said, “Thank you SO MUCH. I’m a big fan!”
Then he said, “Thank you.” AAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! He then got into the white Escalade that was waiting for him, and left.
When he left, I immediately freaked out! The first person I called was my cousin, Jennifer. She is the biggest Nelly fan in the whole world. The conversation went a little something like this:
Jennifer: Hello?
Deniece: Jennifer?
Jennifer: Yeah.
Deniece: It’s Deniece!
Jennifer: Oh, hey…
Deniece: Guess who I just met! Guess who I just took a picture with, and he put his arm around me!”
Jennifer: Who?
Deniece: NELLY! (I yelled it so loud, that she didn’t understand what I said.)
Jennifer: What?
Deniece: Girl, I just met Nelly!
Jennifer: For real?!
Deniece: Yes, girl! (This is where I explain the story I just told y’all above)
Jennifer: You’re evil. I hate you.
I hung up the phone, and we headed to Lincoln Center

<<> Play >
We got to Lincoln Center and took pictures in front of the Metropolitan Opera House and a beautiful Christmas tree decorated with illuminated blue snowflakes. Since cabs were so expensive, we decided to walk more than 40 blocks back to the hotel. Steffany got tired, but I was walking on cloud nine and didn’t feel a thing. I was just taking in everyone and everything it was amazing. Walking down Broadway at night with awesome New Yorkers was the best. I’m totally going to live here one day.

On our way home, I saw something that one would NEVER see in Wichita Falls, Abilene, or anywhere in small-town Texas. Hanukkah decorations!!!! There were illuminated Stars of David decorating the tress down Broadway. Although there is a synagogue in Wichita Falls, there is zero acceptance for anything other than the status-quo. In Wichita Falls, the status quo is Christian Christmas. This is another reason I want so desperately to move to New York City. The DIVERSITY!!!!! In one day, you could hear or see 15 different languages. It was AWESOME!!!!

When we got back to the hotel, Steffany was bushed and in for the night. I wanted to go back out and do something, so I went to… Starbucks. My plan was to get a latte, sit by the window, and people watch. However, when I got to Starbucks, there wasn’t a seat available and people were actually standing around drinking their coffee. I just got my coffee and left. I didn’t go straight back to the hotel, which was across the street. I wandered down a block or two and wandered back down toward the hotel. When I got back, Steff and I watched a little more TV, then we turned in. Remember, we have been waking up before God every morning, so the fact that we went to bed at a decent hour is not pathetic. At least that’s what we told ourselves so we didn’t feel like complete squares.
The next morning, our last morning, we got up and went next door to the diner for breakfast. I had some more of that delicious sausage.

Pause
Let’s all take a moment of silence in honor of breakfast sausage. Amen.

> Play >
After we ate, we went back to the hotel to pack. Actually, Steffany packed while I hurried to shove my mess back into my suitcase. We put our luggage in a storage room, so that we could do a little more sightseeing. Check out time was noon, but our flight wasn’t until later in the evening, and we wanted to take advantage of every minute we had. We went back down town and took pictures in different places. We even found one of the fire stations that lost fire fighters in the Trade Center attacks. It was a very solemn experience. I was humbled by their bravery. It meant a lot to Steff, because her grandfather is a fire fighter. We did a lot more walking downtown, because I wanted to see Trump Tower. I had seen one of his towers before. You remember… when I saw NELLY!!! But I wanted to see the one where they film The Apprentice. We searched forever for it. Steffany was getting tired, but honestly, I didn’t feel that bad about it, because I had been all over Chinatown for two questionable Louis Vitton bags.

After walking forever and my bad sense of direction, we finally found it. I took a picture in front of it. There were limousines everywhere, and I wanted to hang out to see who got out of the cars. I really wanted to see if I could catch a glimpse of The Donald. But by this time, Steffany said that she was starting to get cramps, and we immediately looked for a taxi. Tired feet is one thing, but I know all about those painful cramps, and I didn’t want Steff to be out there walking around if she had cramps. Steffany flagged down a cab (for the first time since we arrived I might add), we went back to the Hotel Newton, thanked them for their hospitality, got into a $70 (that’s right $70) car, and headed to the airport. Our driver was really nice. To get to the airport we went through Harlem, and I asked him questions about it. He had a thick Latin accent, but I still understood every word he said. I asked him about Bill Clinton (his offices are in Harlem), and he said that he sees him sometimes. He only had good things to say about him, which was nice to hear.

>> Fast Forward >> Arrive At Airport >> Wait in Long Ass Line >> Security >> Ghetto Bitch Security Guard Would Have Gotten Slapped About My Earrings If It Wasn’t For Homeland Security >> Late Airplane >> Bumpy Take Off

> Play>
Seeing the lights of New York City was beautiful and depressing. I loved the city and I want to live there. Reality Check: There’s a good chance that may never happen. The flight itself was okay. I slept most of the way home. I was uncomfortable, but I was also exhausted to it was easy for me to dose off. When we arrived in Texas, the captain said, “Welcome to Dallas.” My initial reaction was “Whoop-dee-Freakin’-doo!” I was happy to not be living out of my suitcase and to see my family. However, I missed New York already. Anyways… My cousin, Sharie, picked us up from the airport, and I immediately filled her in on my NELLY encounter. We went by Jack in the Box (Hell Yeah, Ultimate Cheeseburger!), went to my aunt’s house and crashed! This was the best trip ever!

Although there’s good chance that I won’t find myself hailing cabs and dogging wiener carts again, I still have an intense dream of living in that amazing city. When I’m watching TV shows set in New York City, and they show a shot of the skyline or one of the many landmarks, my heart aches. I didn’t think it was possible, but I think I hate small-town Texas even more. I need to New York City!!!!

Update: It has been about 3 months since our trip, and Steffany and I were reunited for the first time this weekend since we’ve been back in the Lone Star State. We had lunch and looked at each other’s pictures. Again, I’m glad that Steff took so many pictures, because she’s making tons of copies for me. However, I’m not a total amateur when it comes to snappin’ shots! I saw the pictures that I took of Steffany with her camera, and … I’m awesome! I must say that I took some very good pictures of Miss Steffany in the City That Never Sleeps! Anyways, it was really good to see Steff, because I miss her so much!


Well folks...that's it. My amazing trip from both mine and now D's point of view. Hope you enjoyed the show!

Monday, March 20, 2006

NYC Saga...Continued (Act III)

Another big shot out to Deniece (who has been reading the comments but making none herself and is humbly pleased by the praise for her writing) for doing this guest blogger thing for me. And I got the final word...she WILL take questions and provide answers at the conclusion of the tale. Enjoy!

PS...this is my FAVORITE part of the whole trip!!!

Steffany actually stayed awake to make our sign for the next morning, and I fell asleep early. I actually went to bed very early and wound up waking up a little before 4am.
As soon as I woke up, I called downstairs to see if there was a transit strike. Unfortunately there was. (Later, you’ll see that this wasn’t as unfortunate as I thought) Great, how are we going to get all the way back to 57th St., the location of The General Motors Building? (Our hotel was between 95th and 96th streets.) This morning Steffany wanted to try to get on CBS’s The Early Show.

I watch the Today Show so I wasn’t quite as amped; but it was really important to Steff that we meet Dave Price and it wasn’t that big a deal to me, so we did the Early Show. Well, we get up and get dressed. Our plan is to walk as far downtown as we could before trying to find a cab. The cab would cost $10 per person (the rate because of the strike), so that would be $20 for us. We had walked just a few blocks when a man and a woman in a white van slowed down beside us and asked us where we were headed. Without thinking, I told them that we were headed to 57th St. They said they would take us there for $5 each. There wasn’t a cab in sight, and $10 definitely beats $20, so we hopped in their van and headed toward downtown.

Pause
I know what y’all are thinking, because I thought the same thing later that day. Oh my God! I got into a van with total strangers in the middle of New York City! However, I have to say, that the reputation that New Yorkers are rude and mean, is a total fallacy. There was never a time that I felt uncomfortable or the need to clutch my purse. Yes, everyone really keeps to himself or herself, and they don’t tip their hat and say “how do” like they do here in Podunk, Texas (which I’ve come to the conclusion is totally fake), but they are totally cool people.

> Play >
Along the way, we picked up a few other people who were also headed downtown. One guy had his business suit in a clothes bag. You could tell he was prepared to walk the long way down to 14th St. He was also pretty cute. We picked up another lady who used to teach at SMU in Dallas, so she knew all about Abilene, Wichita Falls, and MSU.

Pause
When people would ask us where we were from, which they did a lot, we would just say Texas. Then they would ask where in Texas, and when I said Wichita Falls, I always got blank looks. Steffany would say that she was from Abilene, and they would always say, “I’ve heard of it, but I don’t know where it is.” My guess is that they heard of Abilene because of country music.

> Play >
Anywho, we got down to 57th St. and figured out where we were supposed to meet for the Early Show, then we went to grab a little something to eat. We found a little deli/ supermarket. It was kind of unusual, so we just got a little something, and decided to eat later. We went back to the Early Show, and saw that there were people there now setting up things. The immediately asked us, “Are you guys here for the Early Show? When we told them that we were, they were so excited. They said that they didn’t know how many people would actually show up because of the strike. They invited us up for hot chocolate and apple cider. We immediately accepted, because it was so COLD.

Pause
Standing out in this cold for hours, was the coldest I have EVER been. It felt like the wind was blowing right past my clothes in through my skin. I was chilled to the bone. I love really cold weather and snow, but that’s only If I get to sit inside and look at it.

> Play >
We met the producer. He was really grateful that we were there, and he was really nice. He really liked our sign too. Actually everyone liked our sign. It made me feel really good, and kind of proud. Yes, Steffany actually made the sign (I fell asleep, remember). BUT we both brainstormed and came up with the idea.

>> Fast Forward >> Sub Zero Wind Chill >> Nice Old Black Man from Killeen, TX >> Funny Camera Crew >> Crazy Lady with the instructions >> Little Shits from Connecticut >>

> Play >
We did meet Dave Price (he looks like the dad on Alvin and the Chipmunks) and we were on national television. It was a really cool experience to be on TV. After everything wrapped up, I was totally over CBS and the General Motors Building (along with their tightly wound employees).
We then waited about 5 minutes to go into FAO Schwartz, because we both wanted to get warm, use the bathroom, and see the $15,000 stuffed elephant. That’s right! This is an upscale toy store that also housed a $15,000 child size Porsche. After the doors were unlocked, there was a red carpet ceremony before we could get in. I was impressed by the pageantry, but annoyed at the pretension. I didn’t purchase anything, because cash flow was running low. Steffany purchased a gift for a baby shower, and then we left in search of breakfast.
We found a dinner on Madison Ave.

Pause
How cool are we that we ate on Madison Ave in Manhattan?

> Play >
We ordered our food, and Steff called her mom to ask about seeing us on television. I don’t remember exactly what I ordered, but I do remember that I got sausage. The breakfast sausage in NYC is so different from ours, it’s more like a cased link… sort of like a hot link. I’m being so descriptive, because this was the BEST sausage I have ever eaten. I can still taste it in my mind. Yes, I’m fully aware of how sad that is. No, I don’t care.

After breakfast and the world’s greatest sausage, Steffany and I went to Rockefeller Center. We saw all kinds of landmarks and stuff you see on TV. We also saw the giant Christmas tree. It looks bigger on TV. We also went and bought the most expensive chocolate at this Swiss chocolate boutique. Their bulk chocolate was $62 per pound. I found some chocolate bars and would up spending about $10 on 3 pieces of chocolate. I must say, it was very good chocolate, as I am a connoisseur. However, it was just a tourist thing; because in real life I’m just as happy with good old Hershey.

We took some more pictures, and we went into Saks 5th Ave. It was so pretentious, uppity, and reeked of snobbery. I LOVED IT! We went into Louis Vitton, and they didn’t even talk to us. It was so funny! We passed a man who was handing out red ribbons with a new fragrance on it. Steffany and I both got ribbons, because we knew that was the only thing we would be taking with us out of Saks 5th Ave. I saw a scarf for $595. Yes, a scarf-the-- little piece of fabric that goes around your neck when it’s cold. After Saks, we wandered around a little while, but I was so cold and very tired. Remember I got up a little before 4am, I had been walking everywhere, and it was now some time after noon. I was exhausted. Steffany asked me what I wanted to do, and I was completely honest. I told her that I wanted to go back to the hotel, and take a nap. I could tell she was annoyed, but I was so tired and I knew she wouldn’t hate me, so we went back to the hotel anyway. When we got my to the hotel, I put on my PJs, hoped in bed, and I was OUT. I had set my alarm for about 2:30pm, because I didn’t want to sleep the day away. After all, I was in NEW YORK CITY!!!!

When I woke up, Steffany and I talked about what we wanted to do, and we decided to go to the Time Warner Center and Central Park. We took a cab down to Columbus Circle. Along the way, our cab picked up another passenger. She was so cool. She was a songwriter. I asked her if she wrote anything we may have heard, and she said sure. She wrote Pieces of Me by Ashlee Simpson, Escape by Enrique Inglesias, and another one that I can’t remember. It was so cool to meet her.
We got to Columbus Circle and took a few pictures, because we had a really great view of the CNN tower. We went inside the Time Warner Center and went into William Sonoma. It was so pretty in there, and they had samples of the best mulled apple cider. Also, Steffany found some sort of cooking thermometer that she had been looking for to get her dad for Christmas.

<<> Play >
We left Time Warner and went across the street to Central Park. They were having a Christmas market with all sorts of different items. It was so cool. They had all kinds of jewelry, clothes, and iPod accessories.

Pause
I want an iPod. That’s it.

We walked around there for a while, and then we went into the park to take pictures. We also wanted to take pictures at Lincoln Center, because they had the most beautiful Christmas Tree. We headed across the street, and I decided that I wanted to take a picture in front of the Trump Tower.

Pause
The story I am now about to tell was the highlight of my trip. Read very carefully!

Ah ha...a cliff hanger!!! I promise that the next entry will be one you'll want to read. It involves a celebrity and a picture (that with D's permission I'll post too!).

Saturday, March 18, 2006

NYC Experienced (Act II)

For those of you just tuning in and for those of you that are returning, the following is a recount of my New York trip from my friend and traveling buddy's perspective. I, for one, think she's a talented writer and I'm very much enjoying the story. Hopefully, you are too! (If you missed the first part scroll down a post or two or simply click here.)

Y’all are familiar with the term “butt crack of dawn,” right? Well, this was the first of two mornings that we would be up before the sun. We were scheduled to take a tour, so we had to get up early. We also got up a little earlier than we needed to, because we had to figure out the subway system. It was really easy to do, and I’m glad we did it on Monday, because that would be the last chance for us to experience it. (More on that later) I like riding the subway. The funny thing was that Steffany and I were the only ones talking. People really keep to themselves around here, so it was just me and Steffany chattering away in our not so discreet accents. I wonder what our fellow patrons were thinking as we sat there talking. We arrived at Times Square, but had to walk a few blocks to 48th St. to get to where the Party Shuttle Tour was going to meet. On the way, we stopped at Starbucks (there’s one, sometimes two, every block).

Pause
Steffany and I tried not to eat at chain restaurants that we could eat here at home, but to me Starbucks didn’t count. Steffany said that it did count as a chain, but didn’t fight me on it. She was really great about my frequent Starbucks stops. In fact, anyone who knows what I’m like sans morning coffee would also be willing to give in on this one.

> Play >
We arrive at the shuttle where we meet Tom, our tour guide. Tom was absolutely wonderful, and Steffany and I both just loved him to pieces! When we first met Tom, my gaydar went through the roof. I thought who better do show us around New York City than a gay man that has lived her for over 30 years. For those of you who don’t know, I’m a total fag hag. Anywho… the driver, Ron, gave me grief, because I was wearing my Dallas Cowboys sweatshirt. Again, for those of you who don’t know, I love the Dallas Cowboys more that I love my own family. If you knew my family, you’d understand… anyways... The tour was awesome. We went to Strawberry Fields, which was amazing to see in person. We also saw were John Lennon was shot. It was very intense.

When we got back onto the shuttle Steffany pointed and said, “Isn’t he cute?!” I didn’t know who she was talking about, because she was pointing to the old man with his wife in the seat in front of us. “Who are you talkin’ about?” I questioned. “Him,” she replied. WHAT? Steffany was in deed pointing to the man in front of us! I turned to her and said, “Steffany, what is it with you and guys on Social Security?!” If there’s one thing I know for sure, it’s the fact that Steffany and I will never fight over a guy, (not just because we’re best buddies) because she has the weirdest taste in men. I think she as an inner Anna Nicole Smith… without the nudity, drugs, TrimSpa, and extreme mental disorders…. But I digress. He and his wife were very nice people as was everyone else on the tour. There were people from everywhere. It was great!

>> Fast Forward >> Empire State Building >> Wall Street >> George Washington Arch >> China Town >>

> Play>
The most fun for me was the pier. We ate lunch, bought souvenirs, and took pictures in front of the Brooklyn Bridge. Steffany ate a Nathan’s hotdog. I didn’t know what the big deal was until she told me that they sponsor that huge hotdog eating contest. I was a little disappointed that I didn’t know that, because I would have eaten there instead of the dinky little Chinese fast food place. We took a couple pictures, and then we headed back to the shuttle, because we were off to ride the Staten Island Ferry.
The ferry ride was really windy and very cold, but I thought it was great, because we past by Ellis Island and Liberty Island. I got so excited when we saw the Statue of Liberty, that I took so many pictures. Now, I regret all of the pictures I took of lady liberty, because I have about 983 useless shots that I could have used for something else.

After Staten Island, we saw Ground Zero. Actually, we saw a big fence with plastic on it surrounding Ground Zero. They are constructing the new building and memorial site, so we didn’t get to see much. All I remember about that was that it was really cold, and I had to pee really bad. However, we did see the church where the 9/11 rescue workers stayed. It was really beautiful and awe-inspiring. After that stop, we went back to Times Square were we said goodbye to Tom, Ron, and our fellow tourists. Steffany even got her picture taken with Tom.

When the tour was over, Steffany and I went back to Chinatown on a mission to find some Louis Vitton for some friends of hers. I have to say that this was one of the low points of the trip for me. I had been up since 5am, it was extremely cold, I was tired as hell, and let’s face it, it’s not like the purses were for my friends, so I couldn’t have cared less. It was cold and everyone and their mama was trying to shove some useless junk down our throats. I can still hear them in my nightmares… “You buy! You buy!” “Twenty-five dollar! Special for you!” OH MY GOD! LEAVE ME ALONE! However, I’m not gonna play it off like I didn’t get anything. I walked away with a beautiful cashmere (yeah right, it was acrylic) scarf.

After we left Chinatown, we took the subway back to Times Square to grab some dinner. Yes, I’m fully aware that we could have eaten in Chinatown, but I wasn’t in the mood for Kung Pao anything. We ended up at a Paks, Pacs, …something that started with a “P” Wholesome Foods eatery. I had a slice of pizza, a macaroon, and a Pepsi. Wholesome my ass! After eating, we looked around Time Square a little more, and bought some of the more expensive souvenirs, which I kept for myself. (I gave my friends those cheap ass I heart NY t-shirts. Ha Ha) We were both really tired at this point, so we took the Subway back to the Hotel Newton. I must say, the staff here was great, and I recommend them to anyone traveling to the city. It’s nothing fancy, but it was safe and clean. We had to get up early the next morning, so we just watched a little TV and went to bed.

For the record...I do not have a thing for guys on social security. I find men attractive. I can't help it if some of them happen to be older than I am. Believe me, there are plenty of not so attractive older men out there too.

Friday, March 17, 2006

Pinch Protection

Voted best Irish joke of 2005!

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said,"Here's to spending the rest of me life between the legs of me wife! That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast ofthe night! He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night!" She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?" John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life sitting in church beside me wife.""Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said. The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary." "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."

Happy St. Patrick's Day!!!

Thursday, March 16, 2006

New York City...Explained

For those few of you out there that were patiently waiting for "the rest of the story" from Deniece well here it is. I'm happy to say that it was a very good recount of what happened. And I personally think D has writing talents that are amazing! So, sit back and enjoy. (This will appear in parts because it's very long. )

For at least the past 7-10 years of my life, I have wanted to live in New York City. Sure, I had never been, but it just looked like so much fun on TV. I desperately wanted to be Carrie sipping on a Cosmopolitan at the Rainbow Room or Monica relaxing with an oversized cup of coffee at Central Perk (which doesn’t actually exist, but you get the picture). So when Steffany and I started seriously discussing a trip to New York, I jumped at the chance. I had to see if I, a girl from Graham Texas, pop. 8986, could really by all right in The Big Apple.

>> Fast Forward>> Months of Planning >> Finances Going Wrong >> Almost Backing Out >> Belinda and Henry (Steff’s parents) Were Amazing >> Preparation >> New York City, HERE WE COME!!!!!

>Play>

When we arrive in New York, my immediate thought its, “OH MY GOD! I’M IN NEW YORK CITY!” I was just surging with so much excitement!

Pause
In my family and most circles of friends, and am the one who always takes pictures. I take more pictures that anyone in the whole world… or so I thought. Right when we came off the plane, I heard a sweet southern voice say, “Could you take our picture.” It was Steffany asking the first of many strangers to capture this Kodak moment in our lives. To tell the truth, it did get old, but in hindsight, I’m glad she took so many pictures that I can make copies of!

>> Fast Forward >> Baggage Claim >> Crazy Shuttle Ride >> Cozy Hotel >>

> Play >
When we arrived at the hotel, we didn’t have much time until we had to be at the Broadway Show. So we put away our luggage. Actually, Steffany put away her luggage, and I just threw mine around my side of the room. I’m a little sloppy, but Steffany loves me despite that. J We were really hungry and couldn’t wait until after the show; so we grabbed a quick bite from Subway, and took it back to the room. Just for the record, I have to ask, what the hell kind of a Subway doesn’t have Ranch dressing. Hello… this is still America!

Anyways, we got ready, and both of us looked very lovely if I do say so myself. We hailed a cab; which neither one of us really knew how to do, but I just raised my hand like they do in the movies and it totally worked! I felt so cool. Yes, I realize that millions of people do this everyday in every corner of the world, but it was a first for me, so just humor me. We drove into Times Square to 42nd St, and it was the most amazing sight. Times Square did not disappoint at all. It looks just like it does on TV. There are advertisements everywhere and neon as far as the eye could see. We got out of the cab and walked just a little ways down to our theater to see Beauty and the Beast.

Pause
Steffany and I had been planning this trip since the summer, and we booked the show tickets along with our airline tickets. Therefore, when The Great Oprah Winfrey announced the December 1st opening of the Broadway production of The Color Purple (my absolute favorite movie in the entire world), I was a little disappointed that it was too late to be able to see it. However, I must say, Beauty and the Beast was wonderfully enchanting.

> Play >
We had great seats, and sat beside great people, a lot of which were also from other corners of the country taking in Christmastime in New York City. I sat next to a man who was treating his daughter to her first Broadway show. It was so sweet. He bought her everything from those ridiculously expensive silk roses to a cute little charm bracelet that featured all of the characters. It was just very sweet. The play itself was wonderful. Not only was the acting and singing amazing, but I was very impressed by the production of it all. The way they changed the scenery and stage was really awesome. I would have loved to have seen another show just to see if everything works the same way.

After our charming evening at the theater (picture me saying that with a haughty British accent), we had a death defying taxi ride back to the hotel. I absolutely loved this cab driver, because he was the embodiment of every stereotype that people believe about cab drivers. He was even wearing a turban, which was so cool. That’s something you just don’t see in Wichita Falls. Anywho… we got back to the hotel, changed, and went next door to The Key West Diner where I had the best bacon cheeseburger in the whole world. It was pretty much empty, so the owner paid a lot of attention to us. He was really nice, and we actually ate at that diner more that once. After dinner, we are both very stuffed and very sleepy. When we got back to the hotel. I took a shower, and went to bed. I was out as soon as my head it the pillow. It was nice.

That basically sums up day one. I'll post more tomorrow night. Oh, and if you have any questions, Deniece will be holding a question and answer session at the conclusion of the story!

Wednesday, March 15, 2006

Useless Information

Fun Survey!!

Place an X by all the things you've done

() Drank so much you threw up
( ) Crashed a friend's car
( ) Stolen a car
( ) Been in love
(X) Been dumped
() Been laid off/fired
(X) Quit your job
( ) Been in a fist fight
( ) Snuck out of your parent's house
(X) Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
( ) Been arrested
(X) Gone on a blind date
( x) Lied to a friend
( x) Skipped school
( ) Seen someone die
( ) Been to Canada
() Been to Mexico
(X) Been on a plane
( ) lived in another country
(x) Been on the opposite side of the country
(x ) Gone to Washington, DC
(X) Swam in the ocean
( ) Felt like dying
(X) Cried yourself to sleep
() Played cops and robbers
() Recently colored with crayons
(x) Sang karaoke
(X) Paid for a meal with only coins
(X) Done something you told yourself you wouldn't
( x) Made prank phone calls...
(X) been angry enough to cause serious bodily injury
() smoked a cigarette
( )Smoked pot
(X) Written a letter to Santa Clause
() Kicked someone out of your home
() Open your home to another in need
( ) slept on the beach
( ) Crashed a party
(X) roller-skated
(X) Ice-skated
( x) skinny dipped

Any nicknames? Steff, Steffy, darlin', doodlebug
Mother's first and middle name? Belinda Jo
What is your favorite drink? geez...do they mean non-alcoholic or not? Non-alcoholic Barqs Rootbeer and Alcoholic Kiwi-tinis
Tattoos?? none
Body Piercing? two holes in my ears
How much do you love your job? what job?
Birthplace: Texas
Favorite vacation spot? Yellow Stone National Park
Ever been to Africa? No
Ever steal any traffic signs? no
Ever been in a car accident? Yes
A, B, C, D, DD cup size?? C
2 Door or 4 Door? 4
Salad dressing? Caesar
Favorite pie? pecan (pronounced pa cahhhn NOT pee can)
Favorite Number? 3
Favorite movie? Beaches
Which season? Winter
Favorite holiday?? Christmas
Favorite food? Steak
Favorite day of the week? Thursday (Survivor night!)
Favorite brand of body soap? bar - Irish Spring liquid - Bath and Body Works Plumeria
Favorite TV show?? The West Wing
Toothpaste?? Crest
Favorite smell?? after the rain (and the smell of snow)
What do you do to relax? read

Well there you go folks...a little useless trivia about me.

Tuesday, March 14, 2006

Venting

The title isn't creative, but I just don't have creative juices flowing.

Yesterday afternoon my mom and I had a major "discussion" about my responsibilities as a member of this household (no matter how much I don't wish to be a member of this household at the moment). I thought I was doing a great job of hiding my resentment of my current circumstances but apparently I wasn't. Some of the things my mom had to say were pretty hard to hear...not because they were hurtful but because they were true. This is the one place where I can vent my feelings about this whole situation, but even I'm tired of my whining.

So...moving on.

This past weekend I went to visit some of my old college friends. It was fantastic! I had so much fun...and that was just what the doctor ordered. I got to have lunch with D. Then we looked through all my NYC pictures (which she loved because there were so many great ones and she did most of the picture taking and I did most of the picture posing) and we talked about the future installments of Deniece's Take On NYC. I really am excited about this post (shameless plug here) because she has such writing talents and wit. It should be enjoyable, but might not be available on the blog until next week sometime.

I went to see Failure To Launch with some friends. Cute movie and really hot main character. Hmmm...sorry. I got sidetracked by thoughts of Matthew. One word of caution...there is a Terry Bradshaw naked scene. A saggy naked kind of scene. Just warning you.

There was also a group party that was a lot of fun. It's always so nice to visit with old friends and people that you don't get to see a lot of anymore. Christian and Jake and I had a particular fun time because we got hooked on some love compatibility sight. Basically you enter your name and someone (typically of the opposite sex but I had some high percentages with some of the same sex) else's name and it tells you how compatible you are in the love department. It's kind of scary how easily amused one can be in the middle of the night. (Again, S...sorry for being so loud. Hope we didn't keep you and the hubby too long!)

Well, it seems like a waste of blog space to talk about cleaning the bathroom and laying in bed watching tv so I'll wrap it up.

Saturday, March 11, 2006

My 100th

This is my 100th post. I think that's pretty amazing considering I wasn't sure I'd even stay faithful to my little blog.

I had a great day today visiting with my friend D. We were roommates in college and the connection just gets stronger. I miss her like crazy now that I'm not living in Wichita Falls anymore. Trouble just isn't the same!

Anyway, D has written a little write up about our trip to New York. I'm excited to have her give her thoughts on this trip. Last I heard it was a little over nine pages in Word so it'll probably appear in parts. I can't wait!!!

Friday, March 10, 2006

Survivor Recap

I have to admit that while I do think Shane is one brick short of a load he does make for some entertaining tv watching. I love it how he just goes off the deep end on everyone...and always just out of the blue. I wouldn't want to be in an alliance with him either. Despite all of that...the funniest Shane-ism last night was when he bummed a cigarette off that guy. I'm telling you the faces he made were the funniest thing...a little gross but still pretty funny...especially when he tried to smoke the filter.

I told you the boys club would crumble. And didn't Sally get out of that in a nice way? I think she'll turn on her tribe the minute the merge happens. I mean, if someone saved me from certain eviction from the island I'd be indebted to them too. She'll flip...mark my words.

In other news, this week has been very relaxing and there was a certain amount of pampering too. I got my hair cut, got a wax, got my nails done, had lunch with a friend, and went on a mini shopping spree. I know...that spoiled thing sounds really true. And this weekend I'm heading off to visit some friends. A road trip is just what I need to round out my week of pampering. But starting next week, I'll have to really get busy with the ordinary kind of things. Ahh how quickly time flies when you're having fun.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

One Word

A few weeks ago I sent out an email to friends and family asking them to describe me in one word only. This is for a scrapbooking layout I'm working on. Anyway, I was surprised by the quick response of some (my grandfather was one of the first!) and also the words that were chosen. It really was a humbling experience. I thought I'd share a few of my favorites and then if you feel so compelled, please add your own one word in the comments box.

enthusiastic meticulous compassionate bubbly vivacious outgoing considerate open-minded confident reliable wonderful creative animated joyful spirited thoughtful caring sweet awesome faithful spunky sunshine hospitable friendly happy

I'll try and get a picture of the finished layout up soon.

Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Burn Baby Burn

"Burn ladies...feel that burn!"...that's what the new water aerobics teacher at the new water aerobics place kept saying tonight. Well lady...I'm burning all over!

Technically, I think that exercise is way over rated. Yeah, I know it's good for you and you'll probably live longer and get into size 2 jeans, but sometimes it's just not fun. I exercise for those reasons...not out of some giddy happy fulfilling feeling I get when I'm done. So, about a year ago I joined up at the local YMCA for some water aerobics. I really do have a fond place in my heart for all those older women....they are great! But, yesterday, a friend told me about another health club that offered water aerobics at A.) a lower cost (girl on a budget here) B.) 30 minutes earlier than the Y (this makes a difference when you still have to come home and fix dinner or shower) and C.) "the workout is better."

So, I called this morning and asked if I could come in for a trial run with this place and see how I liked it. The lady said sure. She sounded young and really friendly. I keep harping on this older/younger thing, but you'd just have to get water aerobics to understand. Most of the people that do this (not saying all) but most are older women. Anyway, she said to come on in tonight at 5pm. There were several things that I noticed right away that I liked. First, the pool is only 31/2 feet deep. I'm used to a no impact deep end workout. This doesn't get my heart rate moving very fast. Second, the ladies are still kind of older, but the instructor is my age. Third, the hot tub is also 3 1/2 feet deep. Fourth, the pool is heated. The urge to exercise isn't strong anyway with me, but when I have to get into water that feels like it came directly from the Arctic that urge disappears all together. So, I get in and things start moving. And I mean moving.

She had us running, frog jumping, kicking ourselves in the butt (literally), lunging. Then we started the cardio part...arms and legs moving. I'd never worked out like this before. This woman meant business. Just when I thought it was time to catch my breath the real torture began. We started to work our thighs and legs. I'm going to have thighs that can crack a nut in six weeks if I keep going there! The instructor kept saying that if it wasn't burning then I wasn't working hard enough. I wanted to ask her if she'd call the fire department because as much burn as I was feeling I was sure I was on fire. My legs were kind of jello-y when I got out. But the workout really was better. And there lies a slight problem. I'm going to change gyms. As much as I hate to leave my teacher buddies at the Y, I really do need to be at this new place. It's more workout (you know since exercise was my main goal) and it's cheaper and well everything just works.

I still haven't opened the jump rope...I'm aiming for tomorrow. But tonight I don't think I could have jumped rope if my life had depended on it. At least my legs aren't still shaking and thankfully the burn has turned to a dull ache in my upper thighs. Oh the things I do for the sake of being healthy.

Monday, March 06, 2006

Weekend In Review

I'm posting in the morning. This isn't that unusual. I've been doing it for several weeks now. But this time I'm doing it at home, in the living room, in the comfy chair, and still in my pajamas. Yep, my full time subbing gig is over. It was neat to be in the classroom for eight weeks, but it's nice to be vacationing at home for the next couple of weeks. (Details to come on the subbing part.)

My family went out of town this past weekend to visit my grandparents. We have four birthdays in February so we always get together for a big "birthday bash" weekend. This one was really nice, as all eleven members of the family were present and accounted for...that doesn't happen often in our family. My birthday wasn't one of the ones being celebrated so I didn't get to open presents but there was cake. Cake makes everything good :o)

I slept late this morning, but I've got several things on a list that I need to get accomplished before I head back to subbing after Spring Break. First on the list, laundry. Going sans unmentionables in the house is fine, but I've got to get out and get some groceries and run a few errands today. Gotta have unmentionables for that. Also, clean my room. It's a horrid mess in there. Hopefully, I can squeeze some scrapbooking time in this week. I'm sadly falling behind.

I'm going to start jump roping. How fun huh? Last week there was a jump rope for heart thing at school and I did it for three minutes but I discovered that I could use a little more cardio in my workout routine than just swimming. So, I'm buying a jump rope and we'll see what happens.

I know this is all kind of jumbled up, but it's better than nothing!

Friday, March 03, 2006

Survivor Recap

Believe it or not, I don't have much to report. I think the kiddos (or baloobas) passed on their runny noses and headaches so I'm keeping this short and sweet.

Bobby was voted off. I would have gone for Shane (since he is very volatile), but Bobby was pretty much a free loader. As much as this pains me to say, I do agree with Shane. I know...lets take a moment and all have a shiver together. Bobby would have turned on their tribe in a heartbeat if he thought it would have gotten him further in the game. Good call guys!

Bobby and Bruce spent a magical night in the outhouse bonding over a bottle of wine. Okay, this I found funny. Here are two guys (pretty much the opposite of each other) chugging down on the group's reward bottle of wine and doing it on the pot. That just strikes me as hilarious!

There was fish cutting. I think they said that they had about 100 pounds of raw uncooked fish. They take it back to camp and the rains have washed away almost everything...including their fire pit. Their solution...let's eat raw fish. I wouldn't think that was very sanitary, but it didn't slow them down. There was Shane chewing on his fish carcass like it was a rack of baby back ribs. ICK.

The beans didn't sit well over at the other tribe. Poor Austin...nothing like having gastrointestinal problems out in the jungle with leaves as your only choice of bottom wipers.

Survivor Question of the Week: How did they get that big head immunity thing into that glass bottle out on Exile Island? And how do you keep something that big hidden from your tribe mates when you're in such close proximity?

Wednesday, March 01, 2006

Care Packages

When I first started blogging, I really thought that I'd lose interest really quiCkly. I had a few friends that blogged and I figured that they would probably stop by from time to time, but that for the most part it would be me navigating blOgland. Thankfully, that wasn't the case. I really am amazed when I think about all the different people I've met (okay I haven't met them but I feel somewhat connected to them) through blogging. Well, toNight I dedicate this post to one such individual....~deb.

~deb is someone that at first comment I took to be a smart ass and I got my feathers ruffled because I didn't understand her...the whole Texan/New Yorker thing coming on the heels of a trip I'd taken. But, she had an interesting perspective on things so I kept reading. And then I discovered that I likeD her. While I've never met ~deb in person or had human contact of any sort, I'd feel safe in calling her a blogging friend.

Well, a few weeks ago, on a random stop over to her piece of blogland, I noticed that she'd asked a question and said if you answered correctly you'd get a prize. I thought she was joking, but nevertheless I knew the answer (pleading the fifth on how I knew the answer because I have a reputation to protect) and in a haughty tone (still under the impression that this was all a great way to have fun) demanded my prize. Well, the next thing I know I've got a response comment asking for my home address. Now I have to be honest. I was hesitant in giving out this information to a virtual stranger but I live at home with a father that owns a riffle and down here in Texas you're pretty much born in the NRA so I figured if she did decide to send NY goons after me I'd be okay. So I gave it out...okay the carrOt of getting something in the mail was a deciding factor too. Sue me....I love mail. Anyway, after ~deb has this information, she lets me know that the prize is related to the question. It's only fair to tell you that the question had something to do with s-e-x. I was leery about what might be arriving in the mail...especially after she told me not to open it up unless I was alone. So, I waited and waited. I'm not patient so I send ~deb a little comment about "where is my prize you promised?" and her response was that it was coming and that I could wear it in New Orleans. Huh?

Well, the other day, here is my package waiting for me in the mailbox. It's smaller than I'd pictured but size doesn't matter...most of the time. Thankfully, my mom wasn't home so I didn't have to sneek off to my bedroom to open it. I cracked up when I finally got the box opened and the packaging taken out. Eighteen of the gaudiest Mardi Gras beaded necklaces came out. And attached to the necklaces were these little plastic pouches that said "Ready To Roll" and "Prepared To Party!" Yes, they had soMething inside the pouch. I've left some clues as to what that something was hidden in this post. Anyway, I cracked up. What was I going to do with all these prizes? (Yes, ~deb...I know what to do with them but I'm not umm active at the moment so....how long can I store these babies?..lol)

Well, like any good friend, I took them to a party (totally unrelated to anything having to do with my prizes) and shared them with friends. Everyone had a great laugh. We even decided that once you've "worn" the prize then you have to wear the necklace (sans plastic pocket thingy) to church (where the most of us would be seen). So far, no one has been seen around town sporting the necklace. It was a great little gift and did a lot to lift my spirits on a day that hadn't been the greatest. So, just conSider this fair warning to all of you who might be thinking of answering a question over at ~deb's place...the consequences obviously will match the crime!!!

Thanks ~deb :o)